Do you intend to desire what you truly desire?


I woke up feeling unusually thirsty. Like I’d run a marathon, almost gasping for breath. It was the third time this fortnight.

We didn’t meet very often, occasionally in lieu of work meetings, or something completely unrelated to us would bring us to each others’ city. With our own separate thoughts we would anyway visit each other’s cities; catching up only seemed natural also harmless, to say the least.

Intention-less. Never did we speak about being together or even expressed the want of doing something on those lines. So perfectly crawled in our well settled busy lives. With our own separate thoughts, we would meet anyway. Loving each other’s company only seemed natural and harmless, to say the least.

Long walks and longer talks. Texts turned into snaps, snaps turned to videos, videos progressed to Skype meetings, and busy days required long calls. We didn’t want to get involved, we were just talking. With our own separate thoughts, we took that late night stroll anyway. A walk around the corner seemed only normal and harmless, to say the least.

We joked that night, about the possibility of being together. The pause in the goodbye was rather long this time. Calls were made hesitantly, texts were kept short, emoticons were asked to step away. With our similar thought, we decided to draw away. That dream seemed completely unplanned and not so harmless, to say the least.

Unplanned Dreams.

Before entering the departures gate, he held my hand. Not the formal friendly holding hands. The fingers entwined, I-feel-for-you holding hands. 

Before I landed in his city he made sure all arrangements were made for me to only see him once I enter his city. 

Our hugs had become less long, more longing. His hands around my waist and mine around his neck.

Our eye-stare-locks were long and deep like the body was doing the casual rant about the weather but the mind was thinking about warming up in his arms.

That stroll in the night escalated my dreams, there on. We needed to get away, away from people who didn’t get what this was, we didn’t get it either. But the urge to feel you on my lips was too strong for me to consider anything else. So when you paused a little longer while saying goodbye, I knew that was my cue to kiss you. And for you to let me know that I have never really been kissed before, cause a real kiss would feel like this. With a mark on my waist left by your digging nails & my lips almost blue with that hell-of-a-kiss.

I woke up that morning feeling unusually thirsty, like I’d run a marathon, almost gasping for breath. The dream occurred for the third time this fortnight. Maybe it was intentionless and unplanned. It sure was not going to be easy to continue disregarding these dreams anymore. 

Image credit: Google


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